Many of you may have noticed that the Mega Millions jackpot was at $312 million on Friday. Now for anybody that doesn't work behind a counter that sells lottery, you may be thinking happy thoughts and dreaming about what you could do with that kind of money.
Unfortunately, when I walk into work and see those big red letters up that high, all I can do is sigh and get ready for hell. You see, when a lottery jackpot gets anywhere above $200 million, all the nut jobs decide to rush to the store and spend their life savings on tickets. Pretty much all day, the line for lottery tickets is 10 people deep. This wouldn't be so bad if people weren't spending $300. Normally I can whip through the line in about 5 minutes, but when a single person takes 10 minutes to make up their mind and want me to print out 100 chances all on separate tickets, it takes FOREVER. Now normally I don't give a crap how long it takes. Work is work. But when people are waiting in line that long, they get impatient, and instead of just buying their tickets and leaving, they have to complain to me. Which gets old, fast.
You have two different types of lottery players. The ones mentioned above, and the hardcore lottery players. These people have played the same pick 3 and pick 4 numbers twice a day, everyday, for 20 years. As they are waiting in line, with nothing to do, a normal person would fill out a lottery card to make it move a little faster. Unfortunately there are no normal people, and they come up and rattle off 100 sets of numbers as fast as humanly possible, then have the nerve to get upset when you ask them to repeat. My favorite mistake is putting a pick 4 Straight and box on one ticket. OH MY GOD you'd think the world ended. I wish I could throw a blank form at them and tell them to fill it out themselves.
The sad thing is, I cant escape the hardcore lottery players even when I'm not working. I bet everyone has been to a 7-11 trying to buy a soda, and the only teller is tied up with some wrinkled up old fart that has a wad full of numbers that the teller has to hand enter into the machine. Your 1 minute pit stop just turned into 15.
Please, if anyone gets anything out of this rant, let it be to FILL OUT YOUR NUMBERS AHEAD OF TIME!!!!
That is all.
--Servant of the People
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